Why Did I See That?

Every now and again I run across an old movie ticket stub that makes me question my ability to make good decisions. The movie title sends me back to walking out of the theatre, shaking my head and wishing I hadn’t of wasted the money (fortunately, I make many a film faux pas at the dollar theatre, so it is not a large financial loss). Recently, I ran across a stub for the newest King Kong and remembered spending three hours with my sister watching a monkey fight dinosaurs. My sister was equally disappointed, but even more so that I kept referring to the giant ape as a monkey. But really, what was I expecting? I hear about these movies and mock the concept long before their release, ridicule the previews and end up seeing them anyway. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me 342 times, what’s wrong with me?

As the summer movie season approaches, I realize the answer. The closer these supposed blockbusters get, the more I want to see them. When I first heard that they were making a movie from the 60’s vampire soap opera Dark Shadows, I thought it was a mistake. We already have that, it’s called Twilight. But then I heard they were making it with a comedic twist. And wait, it’s a Burton film, with Johnny Depp in it? And the screenplay is by Seth Grahame-Smith? Well, great. Now I have to see it.

When I saw the posters and heard the chatter about Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and I thought it was a joke. I expected Will Ferrell to make an appearance during the previews. Then I heard it was based on a book by Seth Grahame-Smith, who, in my opinion must be a vampire or mythical creature to have the time to do all this stuff. I got to thinking what it would be like to watch Abraham Lincoln fight off vampires…great, now I’m going to see this too.

And Battleship…I don’t really have much to say in defense of making a movie based on a game that involves the reading of coordinates. I also do not have a defense ready for myself when I probably end up seeing this movie. All I do know is that if no one utters the words “you sunk my battleship,” there will be hell to pay.

However, I will say that I have managed to see a number of thought provoking, well-respected, Oscar worthy films over the years and my judgment does not always fail me. At least that’s what I will tell myself in the future when I run across a stub for Men in Black III.